Saturday, 18 September 2010

More Searches for an Identity

University was blessed release for me. Finally I was among people who did not prejudge me. Even the presence of former classmates from school did not restrict me - thankfully. I found that it was easier to make friends with people - mainly because no-one judged who you were friends with.

Once again, however, I struggled with my identity. What were my interests? What courses did I wish to study? These were two questions that I asked throughout most of the four years that I was at uni. The first, because one was 'supposed' to have extra-curricular activities. Choir? I had sung in a choir all the way through school. Now, for the first time, that dropped out of my life. Debating? I had friends in the debating society, but that wasn't me at all. Mountain climbing? Again, I had good friends in this society, but that wasn't quite my cup of tea either. I think that I eventually found an uneasy home playing social badminton.

Academically, I had planned to study Computer Science and Information Systems. Having been around computers for most of my life, and used them extensively (both at home and in the computer labs), this was a logical conclusion. Slowly, however, these were dropped out of the selection and Economics became my subject of choice. Madness, I hear you say - but for me, I loved it. For sure, there were elements of it that I never did grasp, but there were others that I simply resonated with. Ultimately, I enjoyed it as a subject - but as a career, no way!

About the only thing that was a constant for me through these years as well as those when I was in school was my belief and faith in God. Though this waxed and waned with the challenges of life, it was the one constant to which I could always fall back and rely on when things got tough - and tough they sure did get.